Happiness: a: a state of well-being and contentment; Joy b: a pleasurable or satisfying experience (Merriam-Webster)
Happiness, perhaps considered the most quintessential goal of our entire existence, thoroughly wrapped in subjectivity. Is the never-ending aspiration of happiness attainable?
If I were to do a quick poll of random people, posing the question “Do you consider yourself happy?” The answers might be surprising, most people in my opinion would spout they are indeed happy. I don’t want to misconstrue or negate the fact that if I were to pose this question to people living in war torn countries or within tragic circumstances that their answer would also be “yes” – but could they still achieve happiness. I believe so. I’ll explain. For the most part (if not the whole part), I believe it is safe to say happiness is a state of be-ing, echoed through the ages, I believe there is some fundamental truth here.
So what constitutes happiness? I asked my five-year-old daughter what her idea of happiness was. “When you have a smile on your face and feel glad,” she uttered without pause or reflection. Intrigued I pressed further “so what makes you happy?” “Crafts!” she beamed. “What about crafts makes you happy?” Ah ha, here I saw her reflect, briefly. “When I work hard to make the craft, it kinda doesn’t feel like work, its kinda like a reward after, cause I get to play with the crafts. There it was, I saw it, I was able to piece it together – happiness could be achieved in doing something meaningful, or reaping the reward of pursuing something meaningful. The meaningful or purposeful aspect is unique to each person – we don’t all do crafts for enjoyment. However, it’s in discovering this meaning or purpose that alters our state of be-ing, and induces happiness.
In revealing the ultimate secret to happiness, an accumulation of factors must be realized. Seeking those things that intrinsically give purpose and meaning to your life are paramount. Gratitude for the smallest of things (even those you deem insignificant or take for granted) is vitally important. Gratitude and appreciation are synonymous, and should be conceived effortlessly. Take a look around you right now, find in your immediate environment five things you are thankful for. I bet this was effortless!
Our reference point for happiness must be internal (our ability to perceive), although our stimulus is often “external.” I practice (I say practice because I’m also evolving) each day being cognizant of the events or circumstances I perceive as “challenging”, this highlights an opportunity to shift my perception to one of appreciation. Take a moment to embrace your surroundings, for all of its apparent misgivings, perhaps there is something uniquely obscured deserving your attention and appreciation. The secret to happiness is not elusive, it is not what we have, it is not what we do – it is the perception we hold of ourselves, our environment and the events we allow to alter our more beautiful un-refined self.
By M. Stairs-Zimmermann
